Hawthorn Tree

Hi All!

As the previous East Asian movie seen was on the more tragic end, today, we bring a somewhat happier Chinese movie, ‘Under the Hawthorn Tree’ (山楂樹之戀). Directed by Zhang Yimou, (known for his movies such as ‘Hero’ and ‘House of Flying Daggers’), the movie stars Zhou Dongyu and Shawn Dou, as a young woman, Zhang Jingqiu and young man, Sun Jianxin, from different economic backgrounds who find each other, and thus love, during the Cultural Revolution in China. Another Cultural Revolution movie, however this movie focuses less on the “re-education” aspect and more on the interactions between the two main leads. Once again, there won’t be a plot summary, as you can google that.

All in all, this movie was a love story at the core, a simple, innocent love story between two people during a time when love seemed to be unreal. So did I like the movie? Yes, yes, I did. The two main leads did their job portraying the characters. The film looks nice. The story was believable. In addition, there were some nice moves, really nice moves…

Today we are making moves…big moves. All that we need is one stick in medium to not so medium length, one large overcoat and one pull-cart wheelbarrow.

(1) The first person holds the stick to one side with both hands: the far hand at the edge, the closest hand next to the far. The second person holds the stick on the other end with only one hand, preferrably with the hand equal to the far hand of the first person. As the walk is engaged, the two persons shorten the stick to the point where the stick disappears. Where are their hands?

(2) The first person requests a coat from the second person. The first person fashions it as a cape offering enough room for the second person to also fashion it as a cape. The second person then takes the coat, stands, fashions the coat as a cape and offers the first person to do so also. How are they standing?

(3) The first person up-ends the wheelbarrow on the front wheels making a box for the second person. The first person then offers a maillot to the second person. The second person goes into the box as the first person walks away. The second person comes out of the box as the first person is wading in water. What is the second person wearing?

Overall, the movie is worth watching. If not for the story, or for the director, then for that awesome stick scene as mentioned.

To Be Sent Down

Hi All!

Your awesome host, Wash Your Hands, is back with another “East Asian movies you wouldn’t know unless you were East Asian” post. This time, we’ll go with something more serious, a Chinese film called ‘Xiu Xiu: The Sent Down Girl’ (天浴, Tian Yu). Directed by actor turned director, Joan Chen, the movie stars Li Xiao Lu as Wen Xiu aka Xiu Xiu, and Lapshang as Lao Jin, her caretaker. Set in China during the Cultural Revolution’s Down to the Countryside Movement, the film depicts the downfall of Xiu Xiu: the loss of innocence and acceptance of experience. Originally from Chengdu, Xiu Xiu was initially excited to be sent to the countryside to be re-educated (learning to farm and such) as she was expecting this to be a temporary change in lifestyle.  She gets sent to a remote area to learn horse herding from a Tibetan, Lao Jin. Eventually, she realizes that she wasn’t ever going to  return home. Thus, with the inexperience of life and the temptings of a juicy apple in the desert heat, Xiu Xiu believes that she has fallen in love with a man who promises to take her back home, which causes her downward spiral to a common country whore. In the end, she does return to where she belongs, but not to the place from where she came.

I’m sort of indecisive about  this film. Some part of me tells me it’s something that I should recommend it to others, but another part of me tells me that I personally don’t really like the film. So then, let’s just go with that, the good and the not so good. The good, the film was realistic enough, it showed us a story that could’ve really taken place during that particular time period in China. The characters, they were believable since they were flawed. As much as I thought Xiu Xiu was annoying at certain points, everything that she did in the film was believable. She’s a young girl from the city, probably lived a good life as the older child, thus her bossiness and the need to have her demands met were justified. In addition, she is a young girl, naive about life and the evils of the real world, thus some of the choices that she were excusable. As for Lao Jin, his character was just as tragic as Xiu Xiu’s. He’s a man without his manhood living in a world where being a man meant power and status, hence he can never act on his romantic feelings toward Xiu Xiu. Thus he can only love her from a distance and silently watch as Xiu Xiu makes the choices that she does, as he really neither her guardian, nor her lover.

Now the not so good. Well, there really wasn’t anything wrong with the film in my opinion, it’s just that I don’t have an affinity for this film. I mean watching it once was good enough for me, I wouldn’t be running to the internet and the looking for the film annually to rewatch. In many ways, this film can be considered as a coming of age story that has gone wrong. Xiu Xiu is sent out to the world away from her family, friends and civilization for that matter, and through the lessons that she has learned, she realizes that the world she lives in is not a friendly place and that there was no escape for her. So, the film to me is worth watching, as it makes me think, but I probably won’t be watching this again anytime soon.

On a side note: I will never look at apples the same way again, and maybe water, too.

Your Secret Is Safe With Me

Hi All!

Your awesome admin #1 (more like #2), Wash Your Hands, here! As of late, I’ve been missing from the blog, and the reason… well, it’s nice out, who wants to just sit and write when you can be running around outside like a mad person chasing birds and other things? Nevertheless, one’s gotta do what one’s gotta do. So I’m back, and ready to be the awesome admin #1 (eh hem…#2) again.

So how will I do that? Well, Asian Movies, of course. East Asian (mainly Chinese, Taiwanese, Japanese and Korean) movies to be more specific. We’ve all heard of the really famous ones (that were either subbed in English or remade) , such as ‘Hidden Tiger, Crouching Tiger’, ‘Hero’, ‘The Ring’, ‘Ju-On’, ‘My Sassy Girl’ and ‘A Tale of Two Sisters’. What about the other lesser known ones? That’s where I come in… introducing to you the  ‘East Asian movies you wouldn’t know unless you were East Asian’ corner. Haha.

So to start our new topic, we’ll begin with one of my favorite Asian movies, a Taiwanese movie called ‘Secret’ (不能說的秘密, ‘The Secret That Cannot Be Told’). Initially, I was reluctant to watch this film because a friend had tried to force me to watch it, but eventually, I sat down and watched the film, and then saw it again with some friends a few days later, saw it again a year or two later, and finally, watched it again with another friend. By the number of times I’ve seen it and when the film was released, I’ve averaged an annual viewing for the movie. So first things first, ‘Secret’ is directed by Jay Chou, musician turned director, who also stars in the movie along with Kwai Lun-Mei. The plot  is essentially about a music student, Ye Xianglun (Chou) who one day hears a mysterious piano melody that leads him to another music student, Lu Xiaoyu (Kwai) and a relationship develops between the two. And the rest of the story, you’ll either get by watching the movie or reading a more in-depth plot summary thereby spoiling the plot for yourself.

“Have you athletes heard of asthma?”
“What are you? Stupid?… That’s so easy, it’s a sort of cold.”
“Bull! You’re not even close! It’s a sport injury!“

So what makes the movie worth the annual watching? Well, for one, the plot twist is pretty good ( it wasn’t spoiled when I saw it the first time, so I thoroughly enjoyed the movie), but  I won’t detail it here, cause I don’t want to be the one to spoil it for you. Second, Kwai Lun-Mei is very good as the mysterious piano student, telling you enough to get to know her, but never enough to know about her; and Anthony Wong Chau-Sang does a great job of being the strict, but overall caring father who’s a little on the whimsical end with the guitar playing and the dancing. (Haha, I love the dancing scene between him and Chou) Third, the movie itself is pleasing to look at, and the music was fitting, especially the piano pieces, though I didn’t know any of them. In addition, the scenes with our two leads together did bring a smile to myself at times. One more thing, I’m not a big fan of movies as they’re too long, but I didn’t feel that ‘Secret’ was almost 2 hours, thus the pacing was good. All in all, go watch it.

These are hard times for dreamers.

Good Morning Everyone!

Coming to you live coast to coast L.A. to Chicago, western male. I’m a writer, you monsters! I create! I create for a living! I’m a creator! I am a creator! But here’s the catch…I’m not a writer. Nor am I a creator. To you, I am a stream of words, a faceless moniker mixed with color juxtapose others that share the same and similar traits. I am a ghost that appears to have something to say. I am a figment of my imagination, as I have no clue where your imaginations will take me. I am the line that is between black and white and grey. And for that, I am not a creator…I am an entertainer: a clown without the makeup; a musician without an instrument; a movie star without the stardom; a dream nil remembered. So where does that leave me? Alone on a beach with a box and no clue. Alone on a Moped riding with you.

Between white and black, night and day
Black night seemed like the only way…
So I danced
Music late, nothing great
No way 2 differentiate
I took a chance

Gregory looks just like a ghost
And then a beautiful girl the most
Wets her lips 2 say
“We could live 4 a little while
If U could just learn 2 smile
U and I could fly away, fly away.”

Hello, I am Barton Fink and I write for the pictures…I write pictures for and about the common man. Movies should be about the average Joe…people like you…the working stiffs. The problem with writing about the common folk is that the common folk are all too common. We experience common, daily, why do we want to see what we do commonly, constantly? Because we all have stories to tell. We all have something to say.

We are all Charlie Meadows in some regard. (Some of us more than others…hopefully not). We are the big, burly next-door neighbor who seems innocent and buddy-buddy enough on one side but is a head-shooting-off, body-mutilating killer on the second side. (Did he kill Barton’s family?)

Perhaps we are Jack Lipnick: the energetic, egotistical, two-faced movie producer. We are the person when we take an interest in something, that something engulfs our minds, as we inundate it with praise. (Fired in one scene and standing in the back-ground in the next.) But our praise only lasts so long. But because we are interested, we owe that something for ever…it’s on contract.

No…We are all W.P. Mayhew: a writer reminiscent of the golden era of production-a time where we wrote our owe novella; a time where liquor was not lingering on our breath. We all want our honey.

Rather, we are Audrey Taylor: Mayhew’s secretary-the voice behind the writer…the words behind the page…the woman found dead after helping a friend. (That was a lot of blood!)

We are Barton Fink. We move to Los Angeles where the only three people we know are a writer (who has lost his touch), his secretary (who is found dead) and our neighbor (a mass-murderer). We complained about each of them throughout our time. But they sure did provide a grand story. And as that story ended, with halls engulfed in flame, a box in one arm, a script (though our greatest work, it was rejected wholeheartedly) in the other, and we make our way to the beach, where we sit alone as a woman asks, “what’s in the box?”

Anna Stesia come 2 me
Talk 2 me, ravish me
Liberate my mind
Tell me what U think of me
Praise me, craze me
Out this space and time

Let’s pretend that I had the ability to take you away from reality: to bring you to your own world where you can see things as you want to and do as you like without ill effects on those around you. Would you like to go there? (You can trust me, I’m a friend.) (Sure, you are) A friend in need is a friend indeed…Even if you do not know the person that is helping you. We are Amѐlie…a lonely child, growing without the loving hug from a father, suffered the passing of a mother, but had the sense to move out when grown. And on a whim, we have decided to help people if our first attempt of help succeeds.

Would you return a small tin box to its own if you found it in a crevasse of your bathroom? Would you say something to the person whom you returned the box to? Would you bring light into a blind man’s eyes by showing him the view? Would you secretly write love letters under the guise of a dead husband to your landlady? Would you send tapes of random snippets of life to your reclusive neighbor you has bones as brittle as crystal?

Perhaps you would break into the apartment of the store-clerk who works the market with his son…a son berated habitually? Not only break in, but move this there, replace one thing for another, add salt to a fine wine, destroy any form of routine in a form of retaliation? Maybe you would prefer to play match-maker with the tobacconist and a café regular? Or maybe you would like to convince your father to travel by stealing his garden gnome, giving it to your stewardess friend so that she can take pictures of the gnome standing near famous landmarks across the globe?

In the end, maybe you would like to play a game of cat and mouse with a person (who works at a porn shop and theme park) that you are fond of, trying to return a photo album? Eventually, you fall in love with this person and win their hearts. Ah yes…this is you.

Anna Stesia come 2 me
Talk 2 me, ravish me
Liberate my mind

Maybe, maybe, maybe I could learn 2 love
If I was just closer 2 somethin’
Closer 2 your higher self
I don’t know
Closer 2 heaven closer 2 God

Save me Jesus, I’ve been a fool
How could I forget that U are the rule
U are my God, I am Your child
From now on, 4 U I shall be wild
I shall be quick I shall be strong
I’ll tell Your story, no matter how long

That would do it for now. Until next time! Keep watching!

A man can be an artist…(A Past Movie-Day and Night)

…in anything, food, whatever. It depends on how good he is at it.

Good Morning Everyone!

Coming to you live from Fhloston Paradise where it is green…super green. Everything takes time. In some cases, the logistics can be forgotten and we can go head-first, rushing into an affair without any worry or consequence. And then there are other times when smaller strides need to be taken; boundaries marked, rules set and placed, the end-goal inched towards as opposed to ran to. If there is a right time for everything, then all we need is a little patience. Let’s take for example, building a relationship. When we were little, we were all told not to talk to strangers. But eventually we grow out of our no-stranger-talking days and begin to do what we were told not to: this being the first step of making a friend. But of course, the friendship is not solidified at the first “hello.” (You could be talking to a serial killer for all you know.) So after the initial hello, maybe some “friendly” banter followed by a period of silence, then followed by the period of return, the quarrels and make-ups, establishing said friendship has become quite a patient affair. Does that mean that all relationships need to be temporally demanding? Of course they do…because that’s what happens in the movies…duh. Why all this talk about time and relationships? Because the circle of friends is rapidly dissolving into a single line. But whatever, it’s movie time.

I had to meet you here today
There’s just so many things to say
Please don’t stop me ’til I’m through
This is something I hate to do
We’ve been meeting here so long
I guess what we’ve done, oh was wrong
Please darlin’, don’t you cry
Let’s just kiss and say goodbye

The first movie watched was Man of Fire. Well…this movie was not watched on the so-called “movie-night” as it was watched the day before during the light hours, but it was still watched. A heart-wrenching and eye-opening flick about an artist. His relationship with a young girl. And the finishing of his masterpiece. Here, we have Creasy and Pita. Though cold and distant at first, with time the bond between the two grows: a bond so strong that when broken, the split ignites an awe-inspiring act of revenge over a number of players which concludes the movie. Why is it so awesome? Because Creasy is an artist. And his art is death.

Revenge Act 1: Corrupt Judicial Policeman
Alone in a car, half-naked, ears cut off and fingers cut off one by one with every finger dismembered leading to another clue to Pita’s believed death.

Revenge Act 2: Two at the Club
With sawed-off shotgun in hand. He gets the information he needs. One guy gets killed, one night-club explodes.

Revenge Act 3: The Convoy
With a rocket-launcher, Creasy enters  the apartment of a retired-couple. Calmly opens the window and fires at the convoy. This causes enough distraction for Creasy to capture Victor Fuentes. Next scene, Victor almost naked, straped to the hood of a car. Creasy shows him the ingredients needed to make a bomb and a small shell which inmates use to hide drugs up their rectum. Victor has all of these up his butt and Creasy wishes that he had more time. He walks away with an explosion in the background.

Revenge Act 4: Samuel
Pita’s father was in on the deal. Creasy doesn’t kill him. But he does leave an unloaded-gun and a single bullet (from his past days). Bullets never lie.

Revenge Act 5: The Voice’s Brother
Creasy gets shot and continues to walk on. Shot he captures Aurelio (the Voice’s brother), who was badly wombed by a car wreck. Struggling, he loses a finger and the Voice submits to Creasy’s demands. The Voice tells Creasy that Pita is alive and that he will trade Pita’s life for the life of his brother and Creasy.

This movie was not critically acclaimed nor well received. But the vigilantism was spectacular.

On a lighter-side of things, the second movie was the visually-pleasing sci-fi flick The Fifth Element. She is the perfect being who falls into the backseat of a taxicab driver’s (former special forces major) cab. There is a black ball of death floating in outer-space and if all the 5 elements are not brought together at the right time, evil will consume the Earth. Leeloo is the 5th element, the perfect being, the orange-haired women who wore bandages, likes chicken and can kick ass. Korbin Dallas provides the love that Leeloo needs as she becomes disillusioned and unwilling to perform her designed task. But of course the fireworks did not start until near the end of the movie…relationships take time.

The things I liked about the movie:
1). The visuals were spectacular: very colorful.
2). The soundtrack. It played nicely with the graphically arrangement.
3). Leeloo (XOXO…hahaha). (Oh, she gets XOXOs, too)
4). The fact that the good-guys (Korben and Leeloo) did not go face-to-face with the bad-guys (Zorg).
5). The timing. A scene cuts only to open a new scenes where the last one left off. Smart.
6). The Diva’s voice is crazy.

The Ruby Rhod character was a little annoying (we get it…Chris Tucker can scream like a little girl). But other than that, I enjoyed watching the movie. (I can’t say the same about other folks though.) (haha, some folks think the first 5 min was good)

A little life, so religious
Will lead a light of love
A little love, so for freedom
Just a little light of love
A little life, so religious
Take this little light of love
A little love, no more freedom
Take me
A little life, so religious
A little love, so for freedom
A little life, so religious
A little love, no more freedom

And that would do it…Until next time! Keep watching!

If I told you that we belong together…

…would you take my hand and frolick? (Hey! Where you going? hahahaha!) (yeah, where are you going?)

Hi All and Good Morning Everyone!

Coming to you live from another beautiful Spring day and still hot from the last post everything is looking alright. And we have a question: have you ever looked outside right before a storm at night? What color is the sky? For those not in the know, orange is a beautiful color: a deep orange, as if the sun never left and is still lingering during the pitch of night. And thanks to Uncle Ray, we all know a little something about the nighttime:

You know the night time, darling (night and day)
Is the right time (night and day)
To be (night and day)
With the one you love, now (night and day)
Say now oh baby (night and day)
When I come home baby, now (night and day)
I wanna be with the one I love, now (night and day)
You know what I’m thinking of (night and day)

Having just spent hours reminiscing about the beautiful people that comprise silver-screen actors. It’s only natural  to expand from the idea of one and think of two. So who’s In the Mood for Love? A really good actor can carry a movie without anyone else involved. But everything gets better when a second actor is present: a person to return the banter; one who takes and gives jokes; one who catches when another falls; one who laughs when the other falls. Character is defined by our interactions with others. So it is only fair that we do things in pairs. That is not to say that everything should be done in pairs, but the results are generally good when said is done, right? We don’t know, but since movies were mentioned, I, your host Penny P., my blog-partner-in-crime, the Hands of this affair, who was a one time administrator turned author (what do you mean ‘author’? I’m Admin 1, if you forgot), Wash Your Hands and Bawarchi will list our memorable movie couples and dynamic duos.

Let’s get it together
We belong together
Let’s stay it together
We belong together

Together, forever, together
Dedicate my life you see
This is what you mean to me,
Together, forever, together
Just as close two is to three
I want you that close to me

Penny’s Peas in a Pod (in no particular order):

1. Breakfast at Tiffany’s: Holly Golightly & Paul Varjak – One avoids, the other not so much. Classic. “You know what’s wrong with you, Miss Whoever-You-Are? You’re chicken, you’ve got no guts. You’re afraid to stick out your chin and say, “Okay, life’s a fact, people do fall in love, people do belong to each other, because that’s the only chance anybody’s got for real happiness. You call yourself a free spirit, a wild thing, and you’re terrified somebody’s going to stick you in a cage. Well, baby, you’re already in that cage. You built it yourself. And it’s not bounded in the west by Tulip, Texas, or in the east by Somaliland. It’s wherever you go. Because no matter where you run, you just end up running into yourself.”
2. In the Mood for Love: Su Li-zhen & Chow Mo-wan – brought together by infidelity, the couple that was never meant to be. “It’s me. If there’s an extra ticket… would you go with me?“
3. Wall-E: EVE & Wall-E – even robots get stupid when they fall in love.
4. Balls of Fury: Maggie Wong & Randy Daytona – I wish Maggie could train me at playing ping-pong. “I’m trying to sacrifice my life for our love. Stop being such a dick!“
5. 2046: Bai Ling & Chow Mo-wan – a torrid affair granted, but Chow Mo-wan leaving Bai Ling, he’s stupid and she’s smokin’! (hahaha…XOXO) “Why can’t it be like before? Please don’t go. Stay with me tonight. Let me borrow you.“
6. The Other Guys: Allen Gamble & Terry Hoitz – no shoes, one wooden gun and big-boy pants. “Let’s do another fresh start because I just want to punch you in the face. Last one.“
7. Shaun of the Dead: Shaun & Ed – Nothing can get between friends…not even zombie-ism. “I’ll stop doing it when you stop laughing!“
8. The Fifth Element: Leeloo and Korben Dallas – together they save the world and she wears bandages for a good 30 minutes. “I don’t know love. I was built to protect not to love, so there is no use for me other than this.“
9. Coming to America: Lisa McDowell & Prince Akeem – he goes to Queens to find a Queen who works in a McDonald’s rip. I love this movie. “Is it just me, or does every woman in New York have a severe emotional problem?“
10. Man on Fire: Creasy & Pita – the man is an artist, honed at his craft. Breaking up this duo created an awesome onslaught of revenge. “I got all the time in the world. *You* don’t, but I do.“

Wash Your Hand’s List of two:

1. Secret (不能說的秘密)–  Lu Xiaoyu & Ye Xianglun– draws question mark“?”
2. Elizabethtown- Claire Colburn & Drew Baylor- “You know, You’re always trying to break up with me, and we’re not even together. ” “I know… We’re not?” 
3. (500) Days of Summer– Summer  & Tom.  “I woke up one morning and I just knew.”  “Knew what?”  “What I was never sure of with you.“
4. Lilo & Stitch– They’re a duo alright.

Bawarchi’s List:

1. Titanic :  Jack Dawson and Rose Dawson..probably one of the best looking on-screen couple
2. Beauty and the Beast: Belle and Beast- what a love story!!!
3. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind:  Joel Barish and  Clementine Kruczynski- the most romantic movie and one of the most real couple in the most unreal situations.
4. Starsky and Hutch: David Starsky and Ken Hutchinson “In Bay City, when you cross the line, your nuts are mine.” What more is there to say and love!!!
5. Anchorman: Ron Burgundy and Veronica Corningstone
6. Shawshank Redemption: Andy Dufresne and Ellis Boyd “Red” Redding-Most inspiring movie followed by a lot of thinking and further followed by hope…if you show the poster of the movie to the middle America they would not take time in saying “GAY”…having said that while watching movie you don’t feel an Oz of that thought
7. Toy Story: Woody and Buzz “lightyear”…”classic”
8. Wall-E: Wall E and Eva-“Robots in love” it can’t get more romantic than this
9. Mary and Max: Mary Daisy Dinkle and Max Jerry Horowitz-“True gem”
10. Garden State: Andrew Largeman and Sam-“you have to lose everything to find that one thing which keeps you going”

That would be all! Until next time! Keep watching!

If I told you that you were beautiful…

…would you talk to me more often? [as she gingerly walks away…hahaha] (hahaha, who’s that she? or is it a he?  *wink wink*) (now now, we all know that you are the only one confused about your gender and preferences.)

Hi All and Good Morning Everyone!

Coming to you live while enjoying a beautiful Spring day and we’re back! With beauty lingering in the air, people are starting to get a little more naked nowadays…Well, not everyone but a lot more people are showing off the flesh (be it pale and pasty from the long winter and long-clothed season). And if you are showing it off, you know that people are watching. Watching you like we watch movies under the hot, hot copper sun. (well some of us watch more than others.) So enjoy the sun and enjoy the extra attention, because we will. Who are we? Well, it’s your dynamic duo of bloggidy blog hosts, Wash Your Hands and Penny P.

Look here, look here
The heat’s gettin’ to my feet
And I got to dance
Girl!
Can we get you hot? (got me hot)
Can we make your temperatures rise? (burnin’ up, burnin’ up, baby)
Can we get you hot? (got to dance)
Can we make your temperatures rise? (make my temperatures rise, not yet)
Burnin’ up!

Movies are meant to be watched. Great lines make a movie memorable. But the actors make the movie. It only helps if the actor is nice to look at. (objective and subjective as it may be…you know you do and think it too.) Take for example a bad actor: someone who can’t act, sounds horrible yet is still casted. Everyone knows why that actor has been casted, but not everybody wants to admit it. These no-talent actors get by on their looks. That is not to say that all of the best actors are ugly. Of course they are not. Some actors can really act and look beautiful too. But our affair is much more focused. And since we mentioned movies and beauty, today we list the actors that we like to look at while on the big-screen.

2night, hey, I’m a movie star
I see myself on a silver screen, huh
2night, it don’t matter who U are
I’m the only star on the scene
U know what I mean?

Penny’s Beautiful Peeps (in no particular order), as always ladies first:

1. Jessica Alba – everybody and their mom thinks that Jessica is hot. I was watching her since Dark Angel and Idle Hands. Nowadays, I can’t stand to hear her voice and she has never been in a good movie, but whatever she can make it hot.
2. Zhang Ziyi (XOXO) – she may not speak much English and she looks hilarious while running in The Road Home, I own every movie of hers on DVD. (But it’s OK, my addiction is healthy.) (are you sure it’s healthy? ahaha, how come only she gets XOXO) (because she deserves it that’s why)
3. Maggie Q – Balls of Fury. (exaclty…hahahaha) I like Hawaii. We share the same birthplace. Sultry.
4. Keira Knightley – despite the fact that she needs to eat 4 or 5 sandwiches every hour, she makes a sexy Pirate.
5. Halle Berry – I dare anyone say otherwise!
6. Aisha Tyler – Tall, funny and a gamer. Yup! Sexy!
7. Scarlett Johansson – I was told in High School that male frogs follow flies that fly in a bell shape. Yup! Curves are good. (Well, if she looks nice at a particular angle, and doesn’t move, ever, then yeah, she’s nice to look at too.)
8. Cate Blanchett – Aviator. Simply graceful.
9. Eva Mendez – “Who is that? Seriously, are you going to tell me who that is?“
10. Rosario Dawson – I’m a universal lover. Mixing can make beautiful things; case in point Rosario.
11. Selma Hayek – she’s nice to look at.
12. Shannon Elizabeth – taking it back to the High School days.
13. Shannyn Sossamon – another Hawaiian native. Black dress in A Knight’s Tale . She can spin my records.
14. Naomi Watts – even a giant ape was entralled. I’m better than an ape. Hahaha.
15. Sanaa Lathan – Love and Basketball. She’s a baller.
16. Zoe Saldana – She may have been all blue in Avatar, but without the makeup, other things may be blue. (what other things? She wasn’t blue in Star Trek.)

Talking about women is easy…but so one-sided. It’s only fair that we talk about the chaps.

1. Clint Eastwood – I’ll give it up to Clint. Started off as a badass, and ending it like a badass.
2. Jude Law – that kid was a player in My Blueberry Nights.
3. Heath Ledger – played a good clown.
4. Denzel Washington – honestly, his movies are nice to look at.

Wash Your Hands aka Admin 1’s 2’s 1’s blog author’s admin 1’s ‘nice to look at people’ list… females:

1. Jessica Alba- I whole-heartedly agree with Penny on this one. She’s hot, and is very nice to look at, though her acting maybe ehhh… However, with time things change, so yester-5 years Jessica was prettier than today Jessica.
2. Zhang Ziyi- Another one I agree with, nice to look at. The thing is, I can understand what she’s saying, so it’s A-okay she speaks little English. (you can’t even speak Cantonese or Mandarin.) (Tch, I can so understand both.)
3. Zooey Deschanel- Well, she’s different, but still nice to look at.
4. Ueno Juri- My all-time favorite Japanese actress, so of course she’s nice to look at.
5. Kwai Lun-Mei- Secret (aka The Secret That Cannot Be Told)
6. Natalie Portman- She’s like Keira Knightley (or is it the other way around?), but she doesn’t need to eat 5-6 sandwiches per hour.

And the males:

1. Joesph Gordon-Levitt- Inception and (500)Days of Summer. (drools)
2. James McAvoy- He was good in Becoming Jane and Wanted.
3. Hyun Bin- Every “Asian” person should know of him. (FYI: “Asian” = American Asian)
4. Jay Chou- I used to not like him cause I just knew him as that singer that mumbles, but he’s golden in Secret.
5. Hiroshi Tamaki- photographer in Tada, Kimi wo Aishiteru and Chiaki-senpai in Nodame Cantabile
6. Leonardo Dicaprio- Yes, he’s kinda chubbier and older now in Inception and Shutter Island, but remember Titanic, when he was Jack Dawson? Oh so fine! (hahaha! you can’t even swim…you could have joined him, then you and Jack would have been together…forever.) (hahaha, that wouldn’t have been bad, at least Jack would’ve stayed young and slim.)

After much convincing and nagging, we got other’s to share their secret lists:

Miss Cook’s list, males first, as Miss Cook prefers males:

1. Robert De Niro- Great actor, nice to look at
2. Brad Pitt- Fight Club, Seven, Legends of Fall (He is a Cheater, I don’t support cheaters!)
3. George Clooney- One Fine Day

Females:

1. Cate Blanchett- The “queen” of England.

Bawarchi’s list of ladies :

1. Nandita Das-I met her and she is awesome
2. Laura Linney-I would like to meet her so that I can put some more words on how great she is…..
3. Kate Winslet-if the list suggests I am into older women, then hell “yeah” …I loved her in Titanic and I still adore her…although I would prefer if she doesn’t get naked frequently on screen……but I wouldn’t mind if she has to..its her life and who am I to judge. (ahaha, I agree though, Kate Winslet is nice to look out. She’s aged beautifully unlike her on screen counterpart from Titanic.)
4. Waheeda Rehman-She is probably the most beautiful women ever graced silver screen
5. Manisha Koirala-The natural beauty…know how people have list of actresses where they compare the actual look and on screen look…I still have to find her on the list.
6. Scarlet Johansson- I wish I could be this guy without being “gay”
7. Konkana Sen-very difficult for me to keep her out of the list coz she is from my college and I have seen her in person walking around in the corridor…i have been ragged (hazing as people in US call it) pretty badly in school however I have a regret that it wasn’t her…

and dudes:

1. Robert Deniro-The true angry young man who never gets old unlike some people who are either forever old or old ungracefully……he has been my favorite from the days of “Mean Street” to “Everybody is fine”

And that would do it! Thank you for reading…Until next time! Keep watching!

Things that go bump in the night…

…are really not that scary at all!

Hi All and Good Morning Everyone!

Coming to you live after a game of ping-pong hide and seek, and with not-so-rosied cheeks and full-wind in breath, there is no table, no ping-pong (or as the Chinese say “ping-pong”), a lot of hide, two paddles, we did seek and have plenty of balls. And that’s just life. The plan was perfect. The execution was sound. But something was missing: something crucial. You know what it is that’s missing, but you just cannot define it in words. You’re lost in thought, tongue tripping with every step on skipped breathes and utters of befuddlement. Then your mind starts to wander into a small nodule of thought, reminiscent of abyss leaving you alone, nervous and scared.

The unknown is scary because we cannot foresee what will happen when we interact with said unknown. We are literally taking a stab in the dark. Do you remember when you were afraid of the dark? Or the time you thought that a monster was outside of your bedroom door staring at you with its red-eye as you suffocate yourself to sleep under your sheets? When we’re young, we’re afraid of a lot. Our level of anxiety diminishes in age, as we become exposed to more colorful things. Or better yet, our fears are focused on other circumstances. We fear losing a job, being broke, not finding a job, losing a loved one, for some falling in love, for lack of a better word, we fear growing up. However, this is not always the case. I remember watching Stephen King’s It when I was 7. That stupid clown scared the crap out of me. Influenced by the movie or based simply on how they look, I still hate clowns. (Screw Ronald McDonald!) Am I scared of clowns? Of course not…I am a clown. But since movies were mentioned, we, your hosts September Thoughts and oflittleimportance, will talk about horror shows…eh hem…movies that we believe dropped the ball.

Oh to think about it
Oh to think about it baby (all the time)
Think about it all the time, funkin’ on your mind now
Feels so good it must be a crime

Our Rantings (In No Particular Order):

Movie 1:

What the hell was Troll 2? It was not even related to Troll. There’s not even a troll in the whole dang movie. (I’ve seen more trolls where I work than in this movie!) Let’s follow the Waits’ family summer vacation, living off the lands in Nilbog, a small farming community which looks peculiar spelt backwards. Echoing classic thrillers from cinema past, the son of the family is contacted by the ghost of his dead grandfather, who warns him of goblins: vegan goblins, which will eat humans if they are transformed into plants. Human-plants! That’s a new type of vegan! The next day, the family embarks for Nilbog: the family has expanded with additions of Elliot (the daughter’s boyfriend, who she fears is homosexual…classic writing), and Elliot’s friends. Along the way, the family also pickup a hitchhiker, who is actually the dead grandfather and tries to warn the son about the vegan goblins wanting to eat the family. Despite, the kid’s warnings, the family continue their journey. (Oh, the suspense!) At Nilbog, the local residents have prepared an all vegetable banquet for the family. Time stops. The son, Joshua, is warned about the goblins again. Time starts. Joshua jumps on the table and pees on the food. (Hahahaha! Cinematic masterpiece…reminds me of another Joshua I know.) I believe that there was a goblin chase in the next scene and the first sight of a person being transformed into plant-life. Oh and Creedence, the she-goblin leader, she makes her debut in the feature. Deaths ensue, sex, exploding corn, and more grandpa-Joshua interactions give a substantial amount of filler material. Skipping to the end, the key to kill the goblins was eating a bologna sandwich. Bologna! (And rightfully so.) This movie was bad and as scary as a baby laughing with her favorite toy with Sesame Street filling the background air on the television. Lessons learned: red corn syrup does not equal blood, goblin blood is green, if your family gets invited to a town where there is no relation or relative just don’t go or you’ll be hit with a whole lot of Lake Placid…which is a whole lot of crap, vegans can eat humans, people made Joshua like to pee everywhere, corn kills, and bologna saves. (Bologna actually makes me gag…goblin!)

Movie #2:

We can’t have a family without a house: a House of Wax. A rehash of the 1953 film, with the hottest stars in young-Hollywood, Elisa Cuthbert (Old School and The Girl Next Door), Jared Padalecki (no clue) (how can you not know him, he’s on Supernatural and used to be on Gilmore Girls), Paris Hilton (who became famous despite not having any real talent other than spending her parent’s money) (didn’t she become famous because of a sex tape?)(I just know Paris Hilton from the hotel chain and South Park) and her boyfriend played by someone. You must forgive me. I do not remember the beginning, but a car breaks down, the couples split up and eventually Elisa and Jared arrive at a small town where they visit a wax museum made of wax and find a mechanic. The mechanic kills Jared and turns him into a wax statue by placing his dead body into a chair with a crazy head contraption that looks like something Princess Amidala had on but with pins that go through the entire skull and a faceplate made of needles which pin open the eyes. The body is waxed by a literal shower of boiling hot wax. Exciting!

That’s all for now…Until next time! Keep watching!

There are two kinds of people in this world…

…winners and losers.

Good Morning Everyone!

Coming to you live from Albuquerque, New Mexico and there’s a little bit of sunshine! Though everyone is busy, and it was raining for most of the day, it’s me, it’s me, one of your two hosts, Penny…Penny Picayune. I’m always down for a good time and for me sleep is an option (especially as of late), so tonight…tonight was movie night. It was a special night, as the circle of friends was missing.  (Aww, Poor Penny, all alone!) Hahaha! But I’m used to it. The circle of friends may be busy, but I’ll play with you…mixing in a little oflittleimportance of course…it’s my party, I can do what I want to.

I am the DJ, I can make U dance
I play what I play because I can
I follow no one, I don’t give a damn
I’m here 2 have fun and make U jam
When I scritchy, scritchy, scratch
I will make U shake your back
U’ll be lookin’ up and callin’ me sire
I’m the leader of the pack
I’m the first and only act
I’m the DJ, I can take U higher, higher

The first movie was Little Miss Sunshine (Oh, I love sunshine!), the 2006 dramedy about a (semi-dysfunctional) family road-trip to a child’s beauty pageant. (In regards to dysfunctional, every family has a little dysfunction, but that’s what makes it family.) We have Sheryl Hoover, an overworked mother who does her best to please everyone of the flock; her husband Richard, who is a hopeful motivational speaker; Richard’s father,Edwin,  a foul-mouthed heroine user; their two children, son Dwayne, who has taken a vow of silence to accomplish his dream of being a test pilot, and daughter Olive, the beauty-pageant hopeful. We also have Frank, Sheryl’s brother and gay scholar who attempted to kill himself.

During a family dinner (fried chicken was involved), a message on the phone tells the family about the Little Miss Sunshine Beauty Contest in Redondo Beach, California. Thus, the adventure begins. The tension in the family only builds on the trip. Richard does not get the book deal he was hoping for. Sheryl is trying to keep the family together. The grandfather passes. Dwayne finds out he can’t become a pilot. Frank reencounters his ex-lover who was the cause of his misfortunes. Olive continues to be a ball of sunshine throughout.

Dream if u can a courtyard
An ocean of violets in bloom
Animals strike curious poses
They feel the heat
The heat between me and u

How can u just leave me standing?
Alone in a world that’s so cold?
Maybe I’m just 2 demanding
Maybe I’m just like my father 2 bold
Maybe you’re just like my mother
She’s never satisfied
Why do we scream at each other
This is what it sounds like
When doves cry

Despite all the turmoil, we have a family that is solid. Through thick and thin, they are still together. Some memorable scenes: The first family meal on the road, we see Richard telling Olive not to eat ice cream because it will make her fat. (So let’s talk ice cream…when I throw it down and there’s peanut butter in the mix…you know I’m rocking two scoops.) Frank buying porn mags for Edwin, like a kid in a candy store. Despite Edwin’s passing, the family still decide to go to California, thus they steal the body from the hospital. The cop pulling over the van, and letting them go because of the porn mags (with a dead body still in the back). Dwayne finding out he’s color blind and his reaction. (Too true. Have you ever wanted something so much, but come to realize that you can’t get it? That’s crushing.) Pushing the van! Olive’s dance at the contest! (I’m Rick James bitch!)

She’s a very kinky girl
The kind you don’t take home to mother
She will never let your spirits down
Once you get her off the street, ow girl
She likes the boys in the band
She says that I’m her all-time favorite
When I make my move to her room
It’s the right time
She’s never hard to please
Oh, no
That girl is pretty wild now
(The girl’s a super freak)
The kind of girl you read about
(In new-wave magazines)
That girl is pretty kinky
(The girl’s a super freak)
I really love to taste her
(Every time we meet)
She’s all right, she’s all right
That girl’s all right
With me, yeah
Hey, hey, hey-heeeey

She’s a super freak, super freak
She’s super-freaky, yow

Keeping the winning spirit alive…let’s watch Charlie Sheen in Major League II. Following the success of the first movie without Wesley Snipes (aka Passenger 57…always bet on black), we have the same antics from the Cleveland Indians. The Wild Thing lost his arm. Jake lost his legs. Hayes went Hollywood. Rube brings the laughs. Cerrano went from Jobo to Buddhism. Tananka’s got marbles. And Parkman makes all the women in Cleveland puke. You don’t watch Major League for the plot. You watch it for Uecker’s excellent color-commentary. You watch it for the laughs. You watch it to feel good. You watch it to see when Charlie Sheen was cool.

Related movie line: Parkman “I’m the only winner on this team. The rest of ‘em, they’re loser. Either by choice or by birth.”

Come on man sing it with me
Wild thing, you make my heart sing
Oh
You make a everything, groovy
Wild thing
Wild thing i think you move me
But i want a know for sure
Come on and sock it to me one more time
You move me

After movie-night, I went to get ice cream. One scoop of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup and one scoop of Peanut Butter Chocolate…you know the score.

…Until next time! We thank you for reading. A not-so-shameless plug: watch out for September Thoughts and that other site!  (what other site?) (Oh, I don’t know…it’s purple I’m sure.) Keep watching! And you’re more than welcome to come back for more. Wouldn’t you like to play with me? (haha)

Controversy

Good Morning Everyone!

For Pat and Frank.

Coming to you live from the silent era and it’s Movie-Night. Tonight we watched the most controversial and arguably the scariest movies in my collection: D.W. Griffith’s The Birth of a Nation. After watching the movie, one may ask, why do you own this? The answer is rather simple. From a movie standpoint, Griffith is considered one of the greatest American directors of all time (eh hem…the Directors Guild of America D.W. Griffith Award), receiving praise from directing greats Chaplin, Hitchcock, Welles and so on. Furthermore, The Birth of a Nation is the highest grossing film of the silent era. And lastly (from a movie standpoint, Bamboozled in my favorite film of all time) it was only proper for this film to be watched, despite the subject and controversy.

I just can’t believe all the things people say (Controversy)
Am I black or white? Am I straight or gay? (Controversy)
Do I believe in God? Do I believe in me? Yeah (Controversy)
Controversy

The film consists of two parts and follows the relationship between two families during the Civil War and Reconstruction-era in America. Part I: We have the Stonemans, a Northern family consisting abolitionist Congressman Austin Stoneman, his sons and daughter Elise, with Elise being the love-interest of Ben Cameron, the son of the Cameron, a Southern family consisting of two daughters and three sons. When the Civil War begins, all of the sons join their respective armies. The Stoneman son and two of the Cameron sons are killed during the War. Ben is wounded at the Siege of Petersburg, taken to a Northern hospital where he meets Elise. Ben is told that he will be hung for being a guerilla. Upon sharing this information with Elise, she takes Cameron’s mother to see President Lincoln, persuading him to issue a pardon for Ben. This part ends with a dramatized assassination of President Lincoln.

I can’t understand human curiosity (Controversy)
Was it good 4 U? Was I what U wanted me 2 be? (Controversy)
Do U get high? Does your daddy cry? (Controversy)
Controversy

Part II: With the Civil War ended and Lincoln assassinated, the South has become “blacker,” as black soldiers, some black some white with black faces, parade the streets. (Let the controversy begin!) We are introduced to Stoneman’s mulatto political protégé, Silas Lynch. During the election, whites are turned away from blacks at the voting booths, thus resulting in Lynch elected as Lieutenant Governor with a black majority, white minority legislature. (We can see the general notions of the shiftless, loud, lazy negro present in other stereotype-heavy movies.) The legislature passes laws allowing mixed-race marriages and requiring white civilians to salute black officers. Ben, fed up with the situation, and inspired by children playing, forms the Ku Klux Klan. Knowing this Austin Stoneman tells Elise to break off her relationship with Ben. From this point, the film chronicles the fight between white south and black south, the fight between the KKK and the black military in an effort to restore White South.

Do I believe in God? Do I believe in me? (Yeah, ooh yeah)
Some people wanna die so they can be free
I said, life is just a game, we’re all just the same
Do U wanna play? (Yeah, yeah, yeah)
Controversy

Being based on the novel and play The Clansman, this film is of course pro-Clan leading one of two viewers during movie-night to say that this movie was propaganda. I definitely cannot argue with the statement. After all, every event depicted at the end of Part I and throughout Part II is high dramatized to provide a reason why the KKK should exist (in the film). From a production standpoint, the movie pioneered camera techniques still being used in today’s movies and films. (And let’s not forget about the industrial standard of Blackface.) In the end, I originally watched this movie after watching Bamboozled (more specifically, the end credits of Bamboozled). I have had the DVD for several years but have only watched it twice. Yes! The subject matter is deemed by some as outrageous. Yes! The film is controversial. But controversy should never prevent anyone from watching anything, so I implore you, our dear readers to watch The Birth of a Nation for yourselves to further understand the development, the construction, the horror, the opinions that have developed, constructed and horrified our beautiful lives.

People call me rude, I wish we were all nude
I wish there was no black and white, I wish there were no rules
People call me rude, I wish we were all nude
I wish there was no black and white, I wish there were no rules

Yeah! (Controversy)
Oh yeah (Controversy)

That’s all for now. We thank you for reading. …Until next time! Stay tuned and keep watching. Next up Cooking-Night.